To the Weeping River
by Mastrrtt
Summary: The revered Kung Fu Council, and China's government are festering in corruption. To take down the group behind this, the five must work together. How could they possibly transcend their limitations, and become the Furious Five? (Post SotS)
1. The Camp Without Tents

I don't own KFP.  
Thanks for checking my story out!

Part i

Tigress washed as if to expiate. Her head deep in the basin, she whipped it out after keeping it there for some time. Beads of water lashed outwards, breaking free from the grips of her fur.

She faced the mirror. _Useless. _It was opaque from her heavy breath. Her fingers trembled as she reached for the towel. _Keep them steady._ She rubbed the cloth on her face, until the clumsy bout made her fur lose pattern.

Meeting the four other masters had only happened a few days ago, and yet, Shifu had already given them a mission. A day ago, troubling tidings had been sent unto them: bandits from Dequan city had been spotted exporting contraband of pillaged naval weapons. According to the messenger, they'd take long intermissions before coming out to export again. Few days from now, supposedly, they would leave berth. They were to meet a rabbit waitress in Du Wa Fighting Den.

Tigress knew it was too early to postulate on the coming events, but it was naive to be headstrong and think all things would go right. She was an overseer for amateurs. And Shifu expected her to successfully bring down a band of thugs? Was he trying to spite her?

She bit her lip, gripping the rims of the basin until the material under her fingers started to bend, contemning herself for doubting Shifu. _This must be another one of his lessons_.

It was only pre day, but Monkey and Mantis were eager for the mission. The five entered the training hall, careful to stay on the on the solid platforms and at wide berth from the danger zone.

"Does anyone besides Monkey use any weapons?" Tigress asked, ushering them to stand in front the rack of equipment.

Crane frisked in place. "I use a staff." he answered.

"You?" Tigress looked at his wings devoid of fingers. "Sure..." Regardless, she took the one closest and hurled it to him. "Anyone else?"

"Maybe Viper would want a bow and arrow." Mantis said.

Viper drooped her neck. "But- but I can't do that."

"That's the point. It was a joke." Mantis laughed. Joining in the din, Monkey chuckled as well.

"Maybe you should use that huge hammer over there, Mantis." Crane retorted, stepping closer to Viper.

Tigress, deliberately trying to ignore a trivial talk, took out a blade from the large tub of weaponry, aroused by the glint. Flipping the knife, she took notice of the glimmer, which seemed to illuminate on its own. Her reflection, though enshrouded slightly by a dull film that coated the blade, was nearly as vibrant as looking at a mirror. Simple and yet panache, she wanted it among her very few possessions. Digging again in the barrel, she fished out its wooden scabbard.

"A knife?" Viper asked. "I thought warriors aren't supposed to try to wound a person?"

Tigress slid the dagger into the groove of the scabbard. "No. No. I'm not planning to stab anyone with this." she said, chuckling.

Soon, the sun was at the pinnacle of its course. This was the cue for the five to run inside their lodgings and start packing.

Tigress guessed that the five would be independent at that, but even the simplest process must be aligned by instruction.

Mantis had too many needles in his bag. Viper was taking her sweet time at packing; Crane was frantically looking for something.

"What is it?" Tigress asked, poking her head in his bedroom.

"My hat! My _straw_ hat! I can't find it." He lifts his cabinet like it was a pillow.

_Strong wings, _she thought, before leaving him alone.

Tigress paced the hallways. Time passed. Their leeway would lapse. Soon, Shifu would check up on them, and the inevitable horror of him reacting to their tardiness was getting more palpable by every passing second.

During her inspection she finally noticed how Monkey, for some reason, has been going to and from the outbuildings – from lodgings to larder. Tigress barged into his room and rummaged rudely inside his backpack. What she found were several gigantic jars of almond cookies hidden behind clothing.

"What do you need all this stuff for?" she yelled, trying to sibilate; but her voice came of husk and sweet.

Monkey scoffed. "There is great power in pastries."

"You mean the power to ruin your health." Tigress said, taking out the jars from his pack and dropping them on him. "Please put all of them back Monkey. If Master Shifu sees what you're doing, he's physically going to bend you backwards."

It has not even been multiple days, and Tigress knew she no longer withheld a single ounce of her bossiness. Doing all things right had been the integral part of her morale. If it took bossiness and coercing to get her comrades to follow the same path, then so be it.

"Fine." Monkey mumbled, carrying all three jars and waddling back to the kitchen. Tigress rubbed her shoulder, watching him from behind as his tail flopped. Then again, she feared that ordering them around elicited no good appraisal of herself. She wanted friends, not servants.

"You can bring one jar though." Tigress said before Monkey rounded the corner. "Just one."

Turning around, Monkey yelled, "Sweet!"

* * *

Being punctual seemed something nigh unachievable. The five waited by the entrance.

Sunlight angled perfectly into the apertures of the rooms that faced west. The backs of Tigress, Crane, and Monkey borne the brunt of afternoon sunlight heat; the rays of sun were like needles pricking their skin.

Crane had given Tigress a side-long glance. _My goodness. Look at her! _he thought. Not a single contraction of muscle or a flicker in her eyelids. _Her tenacity..._ Staying still, his back bathing in what felt like melted wax, took toil. And it was only through looking at her, and comparing himself, did he continue unmoving.

_Even Mei Ling would envy her discipline._

Finally, there was an uneven patter coming from building's entrance, it was faint but at least it was coming. His eyes zipped to the front of the hall, just waiting until Shifu appears. Crane blinked. The moment he opened his eyes, there – instantaneously apparating – was Shifu.

"Students," he started quickly. "I know this is your first mission. I know you aren't prepared." Shifu glanced at Tigress. "But I have seen your skills when you went against Boar. They are sufficient. And I'm sure you can take down this syndicate."

"However, there is another reason why I sent you on this mission. You are a newly formed group. So, I'll be frank: you are not famous. Before you take down the syndicate, I want you to learn about them. Are there any more groups that are related? Who is the leader? Infiltrate before you execute, do you understand?"

In loose synchrony, they said, "Yes master Shifu!"

He nodded. "And I must forewarn: the village you are going to is festering with lowlifes. Politicians there aren't very great either. Don't trust leaders. Don't trust guards. Don't trust anyone but yourselves. Take care. You hear?"

"Yes Master!"

He turned. "Then you are dismissed. Leave immediately."

* * *

Master Shifu watched the backs of his students as they went down the steps. The more they dwindled, the harder it was for him to let them go. As if a lifeline, his grip on his staff tightened until needles of splintered wood pricked his hands.

"Do not worry Shifu." Oogway whispered.

Unflinching, he said, "How could I not. I'm only sending them to their deaths."

"No. Totally not—"

"How can you say that Master Oogway." he bursted. Looking at him, even in his glare was enough discourse to know Shifu was contesting. "They... they are a bunch of amateurs! They barely know a thing about Kung Fu. People's lives are on the line. _Their _life is on the line—"

"But you best believe." His voice, though soft, cut through his rant like a dagger. "Trust them Shifu. Trust Tigress. You have been training her for years but barely let her learn on her own."

Shifu grit his teeth. "But Master—"

"Mmm. They will be successful. _You _just have to wait."

They started as an eager caravan. The gamboled and skipped and talked senseless. But soon the dirt road turned to a rubble path, and the terrain fluctuated in gradient. Lacking topic, conversation turned dry and short. It had only been a few hours and life drained from the group.

Tigress was walking ahead – she had so from the very start – and looked above. Dark clouds blocked the sun, and through this, everything, from plants to mountains, was colored with only shades of gray. Darkness boded ominous things, and in this tenor of setting, Monkey's desperate music—a 'comical' dissonance between his voice and his stringed instrument—was paradoxically unsettling.

* * *

"Tigress!" Monkey yelled.

She looked back, anticipating, only to realize he was just mentioning her name in his song. Watching the rest of five—despite being tired—laugh and sing made her turn the other way. They took on this mission with the proviso that she would keep them alive. _How could they be so nonchalant?_

Fording several rivers kept them from swiftness. They haven't traveled long, and yet it was midnight. They stopped at the center of the fen, settling their camp upon a slab of rock – a perfect island from the wet mud and tributaries that blighted the place.

"F—fire! Finally!" Mantis yelled. He blew on the mound of grass, smoke escaping out the spaces. Soon, a bonfire towered high. In a broad and flat swathe, the light of amber, thriving only from the tip of wick, could be seen from miles away and could still be as bright as the morning sun.

Unnerved, Tigress poured her cup of water on the fire. It did not diminish, but it did weaken.

"Hey!" Shivering, Monkey scooted closer to the fire. "What was that for?"

"Let's try to not be seen you guys." Tigress said, flopping to the ground.

After much silence, Viper spoke. "So... what's the plan?"

They looked at Tigress.

"The plan..." She scratched the back of her head. "I haven't really made a plan."

"Are we supposed to be undercover or something? Because Shifu said we have to get information and all that other good stuff." Crane said, finishing with incoherence.

She nodded, taking a sip. "Monkey, weren't you a criminal?"

"I wouldn't say criminal..." he laughed. "Just someone who annoyed villagers and broke the law."

For a minute, Tigress was dumbfounded. She shook her head. "But you know how to act like one. _Right_?"

"Oh yes. I've mastered criminal slang and business since the start of the universe." Monkey cracked his knuckles, his smile slap-able for Tigress.

"Ooh!" Viper squealed. "I want to act like a criminal too."

"Me three." Crane laughed.

"But honey, you look nothing like a criminal." the snake observed.

"I'm already loving this. I mean, on our _first_ _mission_ we get to be spies." Mantis added.

Monkey pointed at him. "You're right! This is totally better than me being a comedian. Speaking of which, you've all heard my joke right—?"

"Yes!" They all answered immediately.

-  
A/N

I owe big thanks to The Dragon Chronicle for helping me out on this chapter, and also to The Grey Coincidence for the story title. Special thanks to my friends in discord for helping me out on a lot of this shit. I couldn't have done it without them.

LoA is also not canon in this fic. Meaning that the furious five is the first of its kind.

I'm eager to learn, and I'm constantly trying to be a better writer. That includes removing purple prose (which is hella abundant in this chapter). So please! Leave a review. I am open to criticism.


	2. Forlorn Inquiries

Part 2

It had been Crane's third rotation midair; deploring a slackening speed, he pushed for acceleration, racing against a plunging sun. He could have been more efficient, if it were not for the active demolition of the whole city presenting itself to him from below, deliberately slowing his pace. Tigress had sent them to scour different parts of the city, looking for a den called Du Wa.

They could have asked people where the den was, if there were people to ask. The place was barren. Eyebrow-raising barren. From above, the wide-breadth streets were empty. No merchants, no colorful stalls, no hassle of typical street commerce.

Herringbone patterned streets; colorful buildings that were large, not to mention beautiful, and every pillar and parapet were engraved with artistry; Crane guessed that this town was once one that honored handicraft, then took a dismal turn. It was like looking at ancient ruins.

Finally, he made his way to the outskirts of the city. The buildings were dispersed. One in particular stood out. It was a large, house-type building, that had no back, and instead merged into the rockface. A quick curve in his flight path and Crane took a glance at the sign.

_Du Wa Fight Club_

"Yes!" he whispered.

Time was poached of longevity. Without taking a second to land and rest, Crane raced back to the city. _How long was I flying? _The bird wasn't sure. But what he did know is that he was late. _Is Tigress that type of person who's serious about deadlines?_ He hoped—he _really _hoped—that finding the fight club was enough to get him off the hook.

It was a fast flight back.

The five were to meet at the large junction – the easiest thing to spot. Because in the circular node of roads was a prominent statue of a bronze bull, that, unlike the rest of the gray city, was glimmering and new. He could vaguely see the five amass at the foot of the statue.

Inasmuch as, from land to sky, everything was devoid of life, Monkey was able to point out the only anomaly in the sky. "Look. Crane!"

Tigress jogged up to him. "What took you so long?"

Crane avoided the question. "I found it." He made an unskilled touchdown; Tigress was there to stabilize.

"Found what?" Monkey asked.

Tigress answered, "The den."

"Yeh. Du Wa fight club. What else could it be." The bird spiraled into a wheezing fit, but willed his arm to point westward. "It's by that hill place. Just follow Taiyang street, till the very very end, you'll see it there – holy crap." He gasped again, fanning himself. "I'm tired. I tried getting here really fast. Oh gosh."

"Take a breather, then." Tigress said, but ushered the group onwards. "When you're ready, catch up." And so the five, save for Crane, made haste to the fight club.

"A 'thank you' would have been great." he muttered. Perching on the foot of the statue, he watched the group dwindle into the distance.

* * *

"This is it." Crane said, landing right by the doorsteps.

Viper grinned, taking a glimpse at the entirety of the house. "Cute! It looks like my grandmother's nursery. Are you sure this is a fighting den?"

As if on cue, there was a gaggle of laughter coming from inside. The door flung open. A clump of animals debouched out, falling and making a heap of bodies. But they immediately stood and dispersed to the nearby thicket; the noise of vomit—and afterwards, the smell too—was strong. There was a silent concord between the five as they exchanged glances. And they entered.

Devoid of furnishings, flooring, or a back wall, the cottage was there for frontage. Regardless, littered on its grounds were people. Sleeping people. Tired people. Some of them spasmed, some spoke in tongues. It looked like a morgue. As they tiptoed passed the bodies, Monkey grabbed hold of Viper's neck, pressed her against his chest and handled her like a private toy. "Are they possessed?" he asked.

"No. I think this is a safehouse. I used to work in these types of shelters." Viper slithered out of Monkey's grip. "Don't call them possessed. That's really mean."

_Into Du Wa_ was ruggedly engraved to the rock face, and right below this engravement was a cave in the limestone, its palate glowed a luring red. They crossed the room, and entered it. A sudden drop from outside's warmer climes had the five clustered together, despite the narrow passage meant to be travelled in single file. The ending resonance of yells and cheers, clinking glass, and breaking items reached them faintly, but grew.

"Look! Light." Monkey whispered, pointing there.

He scrambled even quicker, eager to escape the end of the passage that he deemed too close-fitting for his comfort.

Besides the inconvenient passersby that nearly trampled over the five, they smoothly stumbled their way out of the tunnel, and into a brighter, more spacious, antechamber; then crossing this, into a wide opening, that finally expanded to the venue.

The sudden blare of cacophony was like the relief of open noise after submerging in water. They started from high ground, on a rock out-hanging. Tigress did not want to look below, afraid that the sight was just as ruinous as it sounds, but she crept to the edge and peeked over. Her eyes widened.

The five seemed to reflect the same surprise.

"By the gods!" Crane nearly shrieked. "How are we supposed to find a rabbit in that mess?"

The question sent Tigress to a near lip-quiver. _What would Shifu do?_

The cave, in size, was otherworldly, and must have hollowed out the entire mountain. Through these epic dimensions, the den created a terrain of its own: There was a miniature waterfall on the very corner, a bit of fog… Candle Lights and lanterns blighted the place, mostly clustered at the largest stalactites, as if to contrive a sun.

A spotlight brought great attention to a large slab of rock that was elevated at the heart of the den – this was the arena. Girthed just at the foot of it were crowds of people. _Crowds of people_ that were perhaps the same size as the collective inhabitants of the Valley of Peace. Nearly the entire populace of the large city twelve boroughs wide amassed here, into an impossibly tight throng. She snapped out of her amazement and turned back to the five.

"Goodness… What do we do?" Viper asked.

Tigress gathered the five, snatching them by their shoulders and heads and bringing them into a huddle. "Here's what we do. Here's our plan. We, uh... look for the rabbit."

"_Great_ plan." Mantis said.

"You got a better idea?"

He laughed, stalling, then looked at the ground, dejected. "No not really."

She nodded. "Look, this is one of the times where we just have to, you know, improvise. Do whatever you can to find that rabbit waitress. D-don't get distracted. I'm looking at you Monkey."

"Hmm?" The simian turned, too engrossed in watching the fight below.

"Great!" Tigress rushed. "We're ready. Now let's go."

She took the first step on the planked walkway. The flimsy wood bent under her weight. The way was a spiral descent down the atrium-like cave. She proceeded, before there was a crack, then a feral shriek that halted her.

"Monkey!" Viper yelled.

Tigress turned, and nearly stepped into a hole that came out of nowhere.

"Is he okay?" Crane bolted to her.

She peeked through the hole. Monkey fell but was caught by the walkway underneath. Looking dazed, he still flashed her a smile and a thumbs up.

"May Oogway guide us." Tigress muttered.

* * *

The column of light faded from the sunroof. Suspending on the railings of the planked walkways were the brightness of lanterns. Every hour, more and more specks of candlelight broke the darkness, creating an artificial day. Tigress was rushing, counting her time by seconds. She sprinted up the stairs, then down them, searched the bars, above people's heads, between every nook and cranny of the massive atrium, and still _nothing._

"Excuse me!" She fought through the limbs of passers-by, cutting in front of them, halting them.

Of course, they weren't too fond of this.

A yak pushed through the group. "Whaddya want lad-?"

"Do you guys know a rabbit? Yellow apron? She's a waitress here."

The yak grunted. "Do you know our friend wolf? Tall, fair? Sports a pink shirt?"

"No…"

"Then pretty girl, do you now realize that people don't keep track of others here?" His words slurred. "I saw you ask at least ten of my friends, so shoo. _Shoo. _Or stay with me and give me a lap dance."

Tigress flared her nostrils. A little endearing, his boldness. And it was enough to collect the tiger's fingers into a fist, and she was sure to punch him deep into oblivion until-

_The rabbit!_

The white little thing was barely a blur from the corner of Tigress's eye, but she had caught it. And she had zeroed in on it. Yellow apron, a tray on her hand… _this must be her! _"I'll shoo." Tigress said.

All intent was towards the waitress. With very little regard, she bodied the yak—and sent him sideways—and jostled her way past the teeming of people, making clear headway forwards.

"You!" Tigress yelled.

The little thing perked her rabbit ears. "Me?"

"Yes. You." Tigress answered. She shoved away a leopard who previously occupied the rabbit's attention, and took his spot.

Tigress eagerly fished through her duffel bag. "Listen. Are you the one-" _Where is it?_ "the one who..." _Aha! Found it!_ Tigress took out the scroll in one clumsy stroke; it flew skywards, making a big show with its midair unfurling and slow landing. She feigned a chuckle, before gathering the scroll in a jumbled mess. "Are you the one who gave me this letter?"

The rabbit had sent her eyes crosswise, appraising the tiger. "Who are you?"

"The person that's willing to help. I'm a student from the Jade Palace. You sent this letter, right?" She handed the letter forward.

She snatched it from her. "Yeh. No. I didn't send this letter, but damn Ju Lung did."

"Who's Ju Lung?"

"The person who made this letter – idiot didn't want to put his name in it. Thinks he might get killed."

"That's… nice to know."

"Come with me." The rabbit took Tigress's hand and ushered her passed the crowd. They stopped only at the threshold of staff territory. Facing Tigress, the rabbit continued, "Now are you sure that Ju Lung sent this to the Jade Palace or accidentally into some Cathouse?"

"What? Cathouse? No, the Jade Palace."

"Yeah okay. Cause if you lying, and he actually hired a whore to do the city saving, he ain't gonna be too thrilled."

"Why do you think I'm a- a-" Tigress couldn't bring herself to whisper a syllable of the blasphemy. "Why do you think that?"

"You seem a little too slim and pretty for the job. Can't even handle a scroll! But I ain't the one recruiting. What's your name girl?"

"Tigress."

"Didn't ask for your damn species."

"That's my name." she insisted. "Tigress."

"What type of asshole parents would call their child that? Poor girl!" Outstretching her hand into the groove, she gestured Tigress to the back. "Alright _Tigress_, wait in there. I'll go get Ju Lung." She scurried away.

And she continued scurrying until a feral shriek scared her to paralysis. And Mantis popped out the crowd, clamping his tiny extremities onto the rabbit and whipping her down.

"Found her! Found the damn rabbit!" He triumphed.

"No." Tigress rushed to them. "I found her! Now get off the poor woman."

Mantis groaned. He hopped off the rabbit. "Darn. Lost my twenty…"

Tigress picked the rabbit up by the head, and pushed her onwards. She looked back at Mantis. "You guys were wagering over this?"

"More like a selfish sharing of money." He took out a purse of coins. "Whoever found the rabbit first would get this load of money."

"Well, you guys need to eventually stop that. As for now," she pinched the purse and flicked Mantis, "this is mine – for punishment… purposes..."

He wiped his bloodied nose. "Bitch."

"C'mon." Tigress started rearwards, taking a torch before entering the dark cache. They managed passed the clusters of cluttered plates and stacked stocks, and eventually found themselves comfortable, hanging by the mountain of rice sacks.

The seconds of waiting were unnerving. Outlying from the ruckus after spending hours in it… it was the unsettling sort of calm.

"Mantis." she whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I forgot. You need to hangout by the door."

He was irritated. "Why?"

The answer was obvious to Tigress. Looking around, the room was dark, outside was loud. A murder could be veiled.

"If... _if _they're planning an ambush, I can't let both of us go down." she crept closer. "Mantis, if something goes wrong, alert the three immediately."

"Right." Mantis said. Then, he left.

Unnerved and alone, Tigress held the torch far front, and with the outwards light, sought between the nooks of the place.

Mantis' antenna twitches were distant but familiar. She held onto that.

A conversation severed itself from the crowd cacophony, starting as mumble, but grew audible.

"Get the others later." Tigress heard. This one was surely a male one, gruff and rasp—with a hint of slur.

A shadow blocked the door light: a definite contour of a bear. Tigress brought herself to stand erect, and on guard. What she didn't notice was her claws protruding out her fingers.

The bear snorted. "Your eyes glow," the silhouette moved inwards. "The glowing eyes will get you caught when you're trying to spy in the dark yah know."

Tigress brought the torchlight to him. His paunch entered the light first, then his muzzle, and then his face.

Tigress' eyes widened. _Goodness._

He was towering – the trembling sort of towering. His eyes were a near body-length above hers.

Beer froth coated his snout and dripped down the sides. She stared from there, and then examined downwards, until she stopped, and she lingered at the sight of his left hand...

Well, the _lack_ of it.

Regarding the man's merits, the question was deeply-seated in Tigress's mind. She looked away from the injury.

"I'm assuming you're Ju Lung?"

"Yes. I'm _the _man." Cannabis arrayed on the inner lining of his coat. He took one out. Then approached the tiger. "Who are you? A master? Student? Messenger?"

"Student." She answered.

"Hmm? Really? You look like you couldn't break a fly's leg. Now I'm sad —you can cheer me up though; light this for me?" Sitting between his lips, the blunt end of the cigar was waiting to be alight.

Tigress grunted. With the torch, she lit it.

It seared his fur. "Careful," He was quick to pull his head back. "You almost burned my face there."

"You said that there was a gang that's exporting military weapons. You said it was urgent too. That it'll happen in a few days. It's already been a few days..." Tigress started.

"Yep—"

She cut to the chase. "So, if you don't mind. Could you tell us where they are? So that I and my team could go. Now, preferably?"

He ignored her. Instead, slumped on the rice sacks, laying on it like a poor man on a pew. "So, Tigress, is it?"

"Yes." she answered.

"Weird name." Reaching out, he overturned a barrel so that a makeshift table was between them. Then popped a flask with a tough champ, and eagerly overturned the flask to a near vertical, and with an open mouth awaited its contents. _Nothing_. He growled, dropping the flask on the table. Clapping his hands, he continued. "Now, Tigress, let me tell you something interesting."

"We really don't have the time for this." she said, annoyed. "If you could just..."

He brought his hand up in a silencing gesture. "We have time. Lots of it actually. So let's talk, just a little bit. So that I could get to know you more."

"But-"

"The more you stall, the later we'll get out of here. So comply, or" he shrugged, "Goodbye."

Now, I'm betting you got a great look at our little town. Hmm? You like it?"

She prompted for monotony. "...Not exactly."

"Smart girl!" He chuckled. "Everyone here would agree with you. Should've seen the rebellion yesterday. All the people in the club out there were fighting. Course, that led to nothing."

"How long was this town like… like," She searched for the right words, when none came, she resorted to pointing outside, to its self-explanatory conditions. Accordingly, a fighting moose flopped on top of the arena's breastwork-perhaps dead; the crowd cheered, and gathered to pull him down. "Like _that_." she finished.

"Two years? Maybe three. Ever since Bohai stepped up to become provincial overseer – Bohai's the bad guy by the way. Him taxed everything, the air we breathed too. Except for this." He jiggled his flask, flaunting it. "We made sure we were given carte blanche over alcohol. Illegal trade of course!" He chuckled, and when he realized he was only impressing himself and not the straight-faced tiger, he continued. "Bohai is the devil. Does nothing in return. Our police-"

"Let me guess, they don't do anything."

He nodded. "Pretty much. All those people outside jus' going crazy? Rebellin' left and right. Nothing happens, though."

"So why don't you move?" she deadpanned.

"You are _very _innovative – but no! That's not how it works." Ju Lung fished from his pocket a metal shard, then tossed it onto the table. His finger pointed to its naval mark. "Was working by the pier, 'bout a year back. So I managed to know a few tons of things about this group. One of the artillaries they were handling busted." He fiddled with the metal piece. "Me took a souvenir.

"So I started an investigation like some damn detective. Followed a few people, found out the whole police force were with 'em. Government officials too. I thought this group of idiots were local…"

Tigress leaned forward.

Smoke thrust out nostrils. He took a few rounds of inhaling the cannabis, then licked and smacked his lips, then continued. "Till I started sending distress letters to neighboring cities. Did they respond? No. So I thought, well maybe they just didn't give a shit. Sent calls to even farther cities. No reply. Sent letters to the imperial army. To the _not_ local governments. Did they reply?"

"No…?"

"Yes. Them bastards didn't."

"Maybe they were faulty messages? Maybe they weren't able to reach anyone."

"_Mimi ni tako ga dekiru!_ Exactly what twelve other people thought – you and them bastards. So I went to the imperial city myself with a bunch of my crew, sent this huge-ass complaint to the offices. Went to the imperial army authorities, gave them the warning about unwarranted weaponry trade. Few months passed, did they do anything? Nah. And I thought 'well maybe they just dun-don't give a shit too!' _So_, I went to Gongmen. Right? Me heard there was a good ol' kung fu meet up. I'm pretty sure _they _gave a shit—"

"Don't finish that sentence." Tigress stood. "No way. The Master Council prioritizes people."

"Pfft." He spread his arms, open to her rebuttal. "Do you see any _kung fu _masters helping my holy ass?"

"No. But you must have done something wrong. The letter must not have gotten to them. The kung fu council is not corrupt."

"Yeh no. I gave it to one of the Masters themselves."

"Who."

"Pig. Barely tall. Has a lot of black spots all over his body. They look like nipples."

"Then I shall inform Shifu immediately after this mission, and then he will inform Master Rhino about this. And all of this could be resolved..."

"No. You won't do that honey." He stood-his lofty shadow bearing a tangible weight against Tigress. "Listen, that rhino guy might be the person behind all of this. He might have seen my letter and used it to clean his ass. I don't know and so do you."

"No." she insisted. "I've met the kung fu council personally. They are not evil. I've talked to Master Rhino, and he is not evil."

"Look, I know this is hard to swallow. Just like it's hard to swallow my – wait. How old are you?"

"Sixteen." she answered.

"Whatever. The point is that you don't know. So you met a couple of fighty-old guys playing dress-up in a conference. And so you flirted with the rhino. Are you a mind reader? Hmm?"

"No. But then why do you trust me."

Guffawing, the roll of cannabis slipped off his mouth. He picked it up, and threw it in a jar of wine, swooped the container off the ground, then chugged the jar empty. Tigress remained staring, plying her dumbfoundedness. _Did he eat the cigar?_

Ju Lung finished, and gasped for air. "Some ol' friend told me. Said you guys were pure. Decided to take the chance. And I'm glad the Jade Palace responded. What saddens me though," he looked at her up and down, his voice lowering by an octave, "_Is that even they don't have the decency to respond well_. Okay let's go!"

A/N

Again, big thanks to The Dragon Chronicle for helping me out on this chapter! He's one of the best authors in this site.

Please tell me if the characters seem like caricatures of their normal selves. I'm doing my best to write the five well so your inputs will help me out!

Thanks for reading me story


	3. Full of the Joys of Hell

"Uuuuugghhh!" Her joints popped as she lurched her train of displaced vertebrae.

For the first time, the freshly trampled snake wanted no more than to throw the nearest item to the nearest wall for no apparent reason other than to allay frustration. Of course, she couldn't-because even when inside a den filled with remorseless souls, where murder was uneventful; where no one, _absolutely no one_, had the decency nor the slightest effort to help a girl like her; and where any poor, mistreated creature her size would get routinely stomped and flattened by large, dumb, attentiveness men…!

She was still a mannerly lady and that must remain unchanging.

The snake delved again into her meticulous search. Minutes counted slowly as she reworked through every corner of the den-another, she had a progress-less term.

Her determination began to defile, until she caught one lucky break. Across the floor—the people rifted like a parted sea, and through this clear and momentary configuration, was a clear shot of the rabbit.

A beautiful, small petite rascal with a yellow apron and monstrous little face! In two hasty launches, Viper reached the fellow, and wrapped herself around her like a rope winding a reel. The rabbit had not budged from the onslaught nor did she fight the snake's hold-only limped there and waited for the farce to subside.

"I got you! I finally got you!" The snake yelled feebly.

She snorted. "Yeah, and so did three other people before you."

The thrill of it all ended and careened Viper back to reality. "Wait." She released the bunny "_What?"_

"You're one of those Jade Palace warriors right?"

"Yes. Yes I am."

The rabbit stood, dusting herself. "You're late, ridiculously late. I'll tell you that. On the bright side, I can show you where your friends are."

"That would be nice." Viper slumped.

She launched a finger south. "Over there, to the left-no, no you're looking at the wrong left, lady. See that counter? You walk by it, till you see this big, big hole by the wall. It's rectangular shape. That's our stockroom. You hear me? _Stockroom_. There's a sign above it that says that, and that's where they're at."

For all the rabbit's painful baby talk through the guidance, the snake struggled to find anything across the optically noisy plane. "Do you mind leading me there?"

"Hell yes I do. I'm done for the night." The rabbit began walking away. "I've been twice tackled by two of you dink-headed adolescents. One of your little birds snatched me off the ground and manhandled me in the air like _I'm_ the villainous wart you're all so stupidly eager to catch." Her voice faded off. "I'm all banged up because of you morons. And I'm on your side people!"

"We're sorry." Viper hastily parted. "And thank you!"

Pushing through disorderly feet, the snake pursued some straightway direction in the indicated locality. She squealed. _Yes!_ As promised, Viper soon saw the definite figure of Crane and, coming closer, spotted Mantis perched by the bird's foot. Their heads were stretched inside the cusps of the darkened entrance, so focused that they had not noticed her reach the vicinity until she strained a cough.

"Viper! There you are." Crane whispered. "Did you happen to bring Monkey with you?"

"No. I'm all alone." Stealing a glance at the entrance, she too deliberated what it withheld. "Fill me in?"

Crane fiddled with his queue. "Nothing much to say. Tigress is talking to someone—Mantis says a bear. Turns out the rabbit was out there only by proxy."

She nodded. "So any more gives about our mission?"

"Well. Beats me. I half don't know what's going on." He scratched deep into his chest with his talons. "Sorry."

_Me too._ Viper shriveled in a timid laughter. "That's totally fine Crane."

"It's actually not." Mantis spoke. "We're incompetent. No doubt."

The recipient warriors glared at the bug.

Crane's eyes suddenly widened elsewhere. "As much as I want to insult you for saying that, I think we have to shut up now. Someone's coming out."

"Ah uh…" In a freakout, Mantis blurted. "Act normal!"

They collapsed in casual stature. Viper looked far, Crane whistled, Mantis stood there, his attempts of the same thing were futile since he remained miniscule and unseen anyways with or without the effort.

A voice intensified. "I just want to say what a great honor it is to be helping you out." Tigress rushed out of the room as if she was repelled by it. "This is truly an alliance you will not regret."

Back to the dark chamber, there materialized a pair of growing, incandescent eyes; it followed with a reverberating reply, "You better keep your word for it." Adjunct with this prophetic affair was a low growl coming from him. Anticipation grew as the amateur warriors pended his entrance, they uniformly gravitated towards his enigmatic character.

But all ended unmomentously when the object of interest, a bear turns out, abruptly accelerated out the doors and halted just before them with a screech. The motion of his whole spectacle was akin to the physics of a loaded wagon on sudden brakes.

The warriors scattered away from the man's sheer girth.

Crane recovered first, shaking his head roughly before appraising this beast. His head marveled upwards in his slow search for the bear's eyeline; the man was gigantic-tall enough that the ceiling joists gave him no clearance. Alas, the metrics of this gave only a temporary scare: at second glance, the bear's over-the-pants-belly and saggy arms proved to offset much of his would-be imposingness. Draped down his mouth were several cigarettes arrayed like fringes, pumped out enough smoke to obnubilate his own face.

Tigress looked at her gradually concerned colleagues, then bit her lip. "So. Ju Lung, what-"

"Hold on kid." The cigarettes flopped out his mouth as he talked. "That talk back there? Whew. _Boring_. I just need to let this out…" His sentence faltered midway by a ferally loud yawn. Again, the five stepped back as he took more space for his stretching limbs. The bear seemed to enjoy prolonging his repose to a pompous extent; the juveniles awkwardly waited for it to lapse.

He ended with a sigh. "So, Tiger—_ess_. Tigress! Where is this rag-tag crew of yours. Hmm? Are they over there? Are they those delicious looking tigers by the counter? Ooh, are they those young group of fighters over yonder?"

"They're right beside me." She deadpanned, indicating her surrounding companions. "That's Crane," the bird gave a curt nod, "Viper, and Monkey-who's missing, and then Mantis… Who's also missing."

Crane frowned. "Hate to intrude but I could have sworn he was just here."

"Bug? He might have been that cracking sound." the nonchalant bear upturned his foot. "Do you see anything? Can't really tell, belly's in the way. Yeah, see there's something green—might be snot though."

_By the gods!_ Poor Mantis was but a broken splatter. Tigress dropped to her knees, peeling the bug from the bear's sole like a strip of adhesive. She rose, hands trembling.

Ju Lung inspected the critter between Tigress's pinched fingers, appalled by how it twitched but remained very much alive. "Oh god, what the hell is that!"

Tigress spoke. "This… this is Mantis."

"Don't worry, I'm used to this." The bug croaked, vainly fighting for consciousness. At last, with feeble yet dramatic effort, the bug passed out.

"Oh my lord!" Viper repeatedly gushed an airy stream till she reached hyperventilation. "What do we do? Pump his heart?"

Crane poked the bug with his feet. "I'm pretty sure insects don't have hearts."

Her words flew headlong. "So how do we resuscitate him-squeeze his thorax? Is that how we do it? My good ancestors!"

While the warriors occupied themselves in blind search for a rough and ready aid, the bear beguiled himself in a spell of probing. The teens' presented appearance was meager-very little good to draw from. First their was the bird: Ju Lung saw his strong wings but emaciated extremities withal. And in a conclusive grunt, the bear gauged the boy just below passable. More guttural noises ensued afterwards at the sight of Viper. He needn't to do further study of the snake-the tremendous, pink, bow that rested upon her crown dispelled all her worth at once. The mantis was an even more of a helpless case.

The only real force here was the tiger, who looked more or less like a monstrous rig of brute and lithe. But even she was very little avail, with her unsteady voice and quivering frame: indecisiveness permeated her.

Ju Lung stepped back, looking at the group collectively. He nodded his head. "Just how I goddamned envisioned."

The bear immediately pulled in a passing waiter, ordering several drafts of the strongest alcohol.

A feminine voice cried. "What happened to that grasshopper?" The head of a strange golden cat craned itself into the warriors' close huddle, intent of giving the spasming mantis a closer inspection. The sudden intrusion of the newcomer made the teenagers shuffle apart awkwardly.

A golden cat. Crane grasped his windpipe, feeling it narrow until only a thread of air could pass through it. Mei Ling? No it couldn't be. He rebounded forward, and, subtly approaching the cat intimately, inspected the cat. The several cross lights from the awkwardly lit den made her face suffer from the distorting refractions-but in a well ordered break down of every stripe and tuft there was on the cat's face, Crane finally rested his eyes from its exaggerated squinting. Not Mei Ling.

Viper, having witnessed the entire exchange, gently flicked Crane's ankle with her tail. "What was that?"

He looked downwards. "Nothing."

A deep voice promptly attacked Tigress's nape. "That's not a grasshopper, Rush. It's a Mantis."

Once more, all heads turned to the alien voice. It was a bull-a well-camouflaged one with his ebony fur and the cave's dark backdrop.

Tigress took a step back from the sentinel-like figure. "I'm sorry. Who are you?"

"The real question is, who are _you_?" The bull retorted.

A silent stalemate was between the two groups.

"Oh, that's where I jump in." At last, Ju Lung widened his arms to regard the sudden presence of outsiders. "This, my little friends, are my accomplices. The bull's Tung, and my girl over there is Rushi." They could only start their formalities before Ju Lung spoke again. "Keep in mind, these two bitches are real fighters." He grasped Tung's bicep. "You see the meat on this arm-?"

"Hey!" Viper whined. "We can fight too."

"Yeah…" The bear replied flatly. "I highly doubt that."

"But-"

"Don't be offended. Truth is you all look weird and slim. Especially you, you look like a fancy stick. Like one of those sticks I used to play with Wolfina. Did you catch that joke Tung?—I was being funny there!" Ju Lung raged.

The bull looked around helplessly.

The bear groaned. "Anyways, what I'm saying is that you guys need to look at a mirror and tell yourselves what the truth is. And the truth is… _you know._" To finish, he stuck his tongue out in disgust.

Viper gasped in womanliness. "Listen here bear! We may not look like much, but the next time you talk to us like that, I'll show you how I chain up my enemies with a single bow."

"Again, highly doubt your threats would actually transpire in the near future." The bear coughed. "But, please, keep talking like that because it's kind of turning me on."

Tigress couldn't bear hearing the altercation ascend to its now impregnable back and forth. She stepped from what was a failing interview (more or less), laying Mantis onto a proximate table before she fled into the anonymity of the crowd.

And she meandered through, every passing head only a blurry contour in her hastily yielded vision. She had not one foremost thought, but everything became an additive trigger for a growing outburst. What would Shifu think?

All her deeper thoughts disbanded when a flask from the nearby bouts came bowling to her; she evaded it, the wide side of the flask skimming across the skin of her nose.

_Oh, crap._ The tiger's perceptions widened and everything blasted at once. The shouts and music finally rose to its genuine decibels, so that the tiger's ear cowered downwards. Another burst of revels came after seconds of steady anticipation. Tigress cupped her ears, intent of locating the spectacle that was creating such boisterousness.

* * *

_The fighter, rumored to be outsourced, congregated a massive amount of fans to the outlooks of the atrium, where they eagerly waited for the foreigner to perhaps display an exotic form of battling, one that could offset the 'The Beast's' impervious force-or at the very least, provide the giant a challenge._

_This new fighter was Monkey._

"_Beast?" The simian laughed while pacing the track surrounding the battleground. "I tell you this-I can knock him down just like that!"_

_A wolf, who had been watching the line of fighters incrementally enter the arena and ebb out disfigured and writhing on bloody gurneys, had enough of Monkey's iterated boasting for the past minutes. "Well they don't call him Beast for nothing, boy." He turned around completely. "Y'know it ain't worth it. Why consider this bullshit?"_

"_Well Sir, the reason is two-fold." Monkey played theatrically. "First of. I'm in a dire mission to save this city. There's this group of boys I talked to. They told me that if I were to fight 'The Beast', they'll be able to tell me this info of very, very very much great necessity."_

_The wolf pushed on. "Which is?"_

"_It's nothing really." He abruptly discharged with a shrug. "We're just looking for a rabbit."_

"_A rabbit?"_

"_Yeh! Just her whereabouts. She wears a yellow apron. She works here too."_

_He smirked. "You mean Xiu? I just saw her walk by."_

_The simian jumped at once. "What! Where?"_

"_She was with that tiger girl…" The wolf searched the area. "Well I can't see them now. But that should give you a hint. Easier to spot a tiger in this tough crowd."_

"_Oh." Monkey fell back; the jolting feeling was lost along with his sense of duty. He moved on with a dismissive wave. "Well I guess Tigress can take care of it-she was probably that tiger girl you mentioned."_

_After a prolonged silence, the wolf asked. _"_So… you still going to throw yourself in there?" _

_"Well I did say my reason was two-fold." __He smiled cheekily. _

"_Seriously?"_

"_Yeh! Have you seen the reward?" Monkey envisioned his cupped hands holding a mound of trickling gold. "My handsome self likes to be paid just as handsomely."_

_The wolf grunted. "Well go on, kid. Give the crowd another shitshow."_

"_Don't worry about it!" Monkey said immediately, his eyes still trained on his phantom fortunes. "I do have a plan."_

"_And what is that?" _

_The simian shrugged, making his way to the line of fighters. "The plan is to make one up when I'm up there."_

"_Well…" now indifferent, the wolf looked away, "You do you."_

"_Pfft. '_You do you.' _I'll do him alright." Behind him, a colossal boar was swept high into the air, plummeting down the side ditches of the ring. The collateral shock was enough to launch the simian stumbling a few inches. __But, never looking back, the simian entered the queue with a deliberately puffed chest, a buffed stature, and still with the same unwavering confidence. "I'm going to win this."_

* * *

_Crap. How am I going to win this_. That was Monkey's thoughts while he soared into turbulence. The floor reached him faster than he anticipated-head first he went, skidding into the ground as to make a mound of dirt against the direction he traveled. Well, Monkey, there goes your teeth. Grudgingly, he stood, spitting debris from his dirt laden mouth.

The gorilla made loud leaps towards the stationary monkey, his noises masked by the cheering crowd. With his massive hand, the ape clamped down his smaller opponent, lunging the shrieking simian a good way, once again.

Monkey, with no control of the situation but still very much indignant, rocked his fist for rebellion. "Do I look like a ball to you?"

Once landing, another skidding session developed; he spun on the loose loam as if moving on a sheet of ice, and ended his involuntary sequence of acrobatic stunts in a dizzying spin. Eyes opening, he saw the land was beveled from its proper axis. _If the earth spins, does it get woozy too? _The simian berated himself. _Focus!_

From the distance, a blurry vision of the gorilla came to him posthaste. Immediately, he stood and looked around. What was there to resort to? The walls were high and near impossible to climb. He scampered to the exits, rattled the lattice bars but was unable to unhinge them. Some guards prodded the blunt end of their spears unto the simian's forehead, pushing him from the gates. "Rude!" Monkey tugged a protruding hilt from its wielder, flipping his now acquired weapon blade-front and lunging it to the raging monster: a successful hit!

But the weapon broke. And that beast remained unscathed.

Monkey cried. "What the heck am I fighting?"

He swore he heard a familiar gruff, wolf voice yell from afar. "That's the beast to you, idiot!"

Now he felt the ground beneath him tremble. The gorilla was coming closer. _Think, Monkey. Think!_ The simian grabbed a fistful of dirt, watched it fall through his fingers: _useless_. He looked out the air and saw its emptiness. There was nothing to use-nothing to cobble up. In vain attempt to keep distance between him and his opponent, the simian impressed himself into the furthermost breastworks. His eyes tightened shut, readying for defeat. _No! You twit. Open them._ He did, watched cast over him.

He inhaled a shaky breath. "Alright big guy, let's see what you got."

A last, quick ploy apparated. Monkey produced a final shriek before the gorilla came ramming head-first, breaking the breastwork into fractured webs. When backing from his impact, the gorilla grunted alarmingly at the simian's missing presence. Monkey, having had sidestepped from the vicinity in time, now absconded from immediate danger. "Hey! Moron!" He picked some ejecta and threw at the gorilla's back. "Right here!"

The gorilla spun and blindly ran upon sight of his target, fists thumping chests. The simian feigned an away sprint, instead making a headlong dive through the gorilla's legs the instant it was proximate. Monkey, in exhaustion, scrambled and propped himself to the same fractured wall. Again, the gorilla made a steadfast beeline towards him, and again, the simian evaded in time, leaving only the breastwork to bear the entire brunt of the enraged locomotive.

Turning, the gorilla saw Monkey far away, as if having accomplished such through some mystical teleportation. The tinier opponent taunted him with a victorious dance.

With a growl, the beast mindlessly thrust forwards. And thus, the pattern formed: a destructive to and fro chase caused greater damage for both the breastwork and the gorilla, but left the monkey unscathed. The cheers had evidently shifted to the simian's side, which succored his adrenaline enough to tough through the intervals.

Meanwhile, a throng of guards were pressed along the exit, laboring to enter through and intercept the already damaging fight.

"Come here." Teasing by the crumbling wall, Monkey gave a final hail. "You angry, grrr-illa!"

A scorning bottle nearly hit him.

Before the beast could give one last ruinous push and effectively collapse the entire arena, a hasty voice yelled. "No no stop!" With a giving creak the gates ascended-in came the group of men who immediately charged at the gorilla.

The crowd fell into a wave of 'boos'.

The most ornately dressed ox marched towards Monkey. "What are you doing trying to do, you! This may be a crapwork of a place but it cost us just as much as a crapton and you're not about to ruin it!"

"You didn't let me through the exit so I was making my own!" Monkey defended.

"Are you goddamn crazy boy?" The ox grasped the simian by his nape and pushed his forehead against his own. "Are you really that goddamn crazy?"

"I mean-" Before finishing, Monkey was promptly disturbed by a macabre, definitely pungent, scent. He looked beyond the ox's awkwardly close head, and saw in the background the gorilla being incapacitated by the wrappings of red-hot chains. The monster screamed, _loud_. Monkey ignored the ox's question all together, even pushing him out the way for a better view. The several armored men lopped furnace-fresh chains precariously over the beast's back, his skin sizzled upon their contact.

The gorilla howled, an unrestrained volume of saliva erupted from its mouth. It finally collapsed in a convulsing fit.

Monkey's mouth hung open. A playful epitaph, a dark joke, or even an earnest, sorry word: the simian couldn't produce a sentence. But as he watched the ape being barbarically dragged into some unlit chamber, he pursed his lips in a shameful line. _That _was something not to make fun of.

"Monkey." He whirled, nearly colliding against the speaker. He first saw black, pristinely woven slacks.

_Oh no. I know those pants._ He looked upwards, slowly; a guilty smile grew on him as he recognized all too well his fate. The simian looked at the tiger's fiery eyes, there variance of height felt emasculating. In a cautious approach, he said, "Well, hi there… uhm, _buddy_?"

* * *

"Now that's the kind of thing I like to see." Stump to palm, Ju Lung attempted an applause as the two silent warriors headed to the view deck. "It's funny. I really thought your little monkey dude was about to pass out as well. Would be bad if two of your mates are knocked out cold before the actual mission starts."

"It's funny you mentioned unconsciousness." She passed the bear, unconcerned.

"Well aren't you just full of the joys of hell." He retorted.

The tiger, who had nearly stopped in surrender, erected herself for reassurance. She continued up the atrium, the others trooping in for the exit.

Shifu's floating head arose in the tiger's faintest vision. "_This is not my list! Where are the _warriors _that I sent for?"_

"_I-I don't understand. It must be an accident." _She recalled saying.

Tigress groaned. Of course they were just random people in a random list; destiny here was distant, the universe _is _impartial—it doesn't care. She was too certain that after their fight with the boar, the grand deed of it would afterwards carry. That one victory had supplanted for her a prospective deal of successes—and she had relied on that too much, otherwise she wouldn't be here. The grand deed didn't carry after the fact, and _this, _this whole mission, was too big for them.

She looked back and watched her four companions travel in yet another close pack. As they moved, a large leopard drunkenly swung after them. In mutual yells, they sidestepped the man's prompt assaults; it looked almost comical. Viper wrapped herself around the drunk-head, wringing him from his midriff, before sliding off; Crane bucked the man over the rails.

The tiger thought again. _Okay, perhaps everything is all right._

A/N

It's 2020! I hope ya'll enjoyed the holidays!

So I've tried to give the characters here (besides just Tigress) a little more personality. While this will be a Tigress-centric fic, I do want to develop the other members of The Five and show their unique identities. Hopefully they have stayed relatively in character in this chapter. However, one of my goals is to make them teenage caricatures of their movie selves, so they may be inevitably ooc at some points.

Also, I should prolly address my 6 months hiatus for those who read the first two chapters a long time ago. There's really no excuse for that. My procrastination is off the charts :i But rest assured, chapter four will be published very soon.

Please leave a review. Nearly all reviews gives me hype - thoughtful ones in particular help me grow :) That being said, thank you for those who _had_ left a review: they are all extremely encouraging.

Much thanks to The Dragon Chronicle and The Great Ying for helping me out on this chapter! I couldn't have done it without them.


	4. Fire by Water's Edge

There was a large stream in the forest backlands of Dequan City. Thousands of tributaries joined at the trough of the mountains, forming this giant waterway - a small split of cord from the Weeping River. Where the rag-tag crew and the five started, the stream was at a fit of rage - so much so that the surface of it was white and frothy and had lost all its transparency. But the extreme length of the river gave way to changes. By the time it was about to be done away, the water was already glasslike, the currents invisible.

So when the five arrived at the ending stream flushing into the backwaters of some deserted beach, they found themselves staring worriedly afar, where the sun sank into the ocean, forming a dimming mirage.

Tung disposed his fifth used cigar on some bushes, its amber sparking upon contact. "Which one of our smokers gonna start a forest fire, you think?"

"Don't know. But let's increase the chances." Rushi tossed hers into the distant woods.

Other than the two's foolhardy stunt, the shore remained quiet.

Tigress grew accustomed to staring at her feet - it had made it easier to put effort into taking steps while zombying through the monotonous walk. But with all the down-looking, she did not at all spot in time the tripping-bound bottle protruding from the sand ahead of her. Sure enough, she slipped, taking several fleeting steps to recover.

"What the…" The tiger marched back to observe the guilty flask. And, it, was freshly littered.

One man immediately came to mind. Ju Lung.

"That utter-" she muffled down a coming curse, and in an effort to not blow up entirely like the ignited fuse of a dynamite disintegrating to its cap, she kicked the flask aside… several hundred miles into the ocean.

The tiger regretted it immediately, watching the bottle wane into the distance. But it had understandably been a long and hard trip.

It was then her patience wore out too thin. She trudged ahead, away from the group's sights, and continued this hasty separation from the others until she entered the sovereign space which Ju Lung had allotted only for his special self; she remembered the bear's declaration clearly: "I'm already an extremely humbled man, but the looks of all you is risking what's left of my pride. So, I'm setting up parameters. I'll be way over there, and you cunts will be all the way back here, alright? Just follow my tracks, or whatever. Keep distance, but tag along."

The tiger started hearing distinct sounds: splitting air followed by subsequent thumps. Wood chips pelted passed her the closer she got to the source. And when Tigress finally pushed apart the brush to uncover Ju Lung's suspicious scene…

She watched in shock as the bear dismembered the limbs of several trees with an axe in hand; he was whirling the monstrous blade across anything - even the ones not directly in his way. Looking aloft, the effects of his violence traversed up the shaken tree trunks and to the now jerking foliage above; new leaves shed on her like a glorious storm, but that abrupt break of inertia on the once quiet canopy might as well have sent a beacon of light at their most current location to any flying passerby.

"No. No. No!" At the height of the bear's next swing, the tiger leaped out, ending it. "What are you doing?"

Ju Lung refused to turn, unmoved by the tiger's barely repressed anger. "I'm coping."

"This is coping?" she nearly yelled.

This time, he faced her. "I can be an asshole to them trees. You have your way of meditating; I have my way of meditating."

She approached, each deliberate step accompanied with a point. "You smoked. You drank. You cussed at me, at the others. And then you isolated yourself. Weren't they enough for your meditation?"

"Enough? Eh, not really. Listen Tiger, I have many ways to get through life, and due to the current situations, meaning you guys, I feel as if I am entitled to use each and every method..." He grinned cheekily. "You know, I call them the methods from my madness."

"But by doing this - compromising our spot?" Tigress asked.

The bear swung his axe down in an excessively catapult-like motion and nearly disintegrated the affected tree. "I'm not that stupid - I made sure we were far out so we're not spotted - we a good several miles away!"

"Several miles away…?" It took her awhile to puzzle over what he said. She hesitated to ask, "Several miles away from what?"

"From them ship, dumbass! The enemy scout route doesn't reach all the way here - am pretty sure. My tree murdering bullshit is safely hidden, and I assure it, on the whore that raised me." He waved off in ignorance. "See how smart I am? How I think things through?"

Years' worth of stoic-training reduced instantaneously to this one moment of acute double-taking. Tigress pinched her fingers together, concentrating all her growing violence there. "Are you telling me..." She was slow to speak, careful of her rage. "That you've been intentionally keeping us far away from the ship? That you've been wasting our time?"

The bear snorted, entertained, "It isn't wasting time if you're deliberately wasting time. By the time we get there it would be nightfall. It is then easier to stalk, easier to sneak, easier to snoop around the place and see it for yourself. Because the dark… it conceals people - lack of light on our pretty faces, right? Then we could board the ship and you could go on your merry way with them bad guys. This is practically toddler knowledge..." The bear paused, waiting for the tiger's reaction - but she remained tarrying, so he didn't let her hang. "I'm telling you this because I think you're kind of stupid."

Halfway through the bear's monologue, Tigress heard all her inner voices say 'ohhh...' in realization at once. Yet, pathetically rising her chin, she tried to keep un-indignant authority. "I suppose that's fine."

"Me thinking you're stupid?"

"No - and I'm not! - I meant this whole situation."

They continued walking.

The tiger admitted. "I wasn't able to think that you had a smarter intention for all this stalling. I…" and she tried to make this unobvious, "I apologize."

"Wow... that was some serious ass shit! Suck a nut, spit all them etiquette-yness out, will you." He placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're officially forgiven! Now go join them other inbreds."

"That's the other thing." she quickly asserted. "I want to talk about your unfairness towards the others, and me. I think your doubt towards us is a bit - well, it's a bit too high. Just, please, give us a moment to convince you."

"Well, it's comforting to know that that 'moment' that destiny deliciously served you with as your proving point, is on a massive, piss-my-pants ship set to destroy China, and crewed by enough men, that for each flimsy bone in your team's pubertal, little bodies, there are ten guys in that ship readily on there to break it." He said this in a space of a second.

It didn't take much to know the numbers of such were overselling the mission's difficulty, but Tigress wondered how much of a hyperbole the bear really had intended in that statement.

A new thought came to the tiger. "Back at the club, you were surrounded by lots of people you know who could fight. There were what – hundreds of them?" Her eyes squinted as she pieced things together. "Why bring us, if you think we're just dead weight? What is your intention?"

The bear looked unharmed by her advance. "You've already proven yourselves to me the moment I learned you dumb-dicks chose to be part of this crapfest. We all know choice and requirement demand vastly different doses of will. First thing to recognize."

He crept towards her.

"Second, I'm not much of a pessimist. I don't think you guys are dead weight. Though, come on, don't get it confused, no - I still think you guys are a bitch-fuck of a load to carry around. But you're a different kind of burden... in that you're still the useful kind - if that makes any sense. It's kind of like, let me think, heavy, heavy sacks of bricks?" He snapped his fingers. "Nail on the head of my dick! That's exactly what you guys are. Sacks of bricks. If things go to planetary shit, I can build a strong, thick wall around myself, about this high," he hovered a paw at his shoulder, "So instead of me taking the brunt of all them shits and storms coming my way, it's gonna be that fucking wall. And, of course, that fucking wall is gonna be built out of you sacks of bricks."

Tigress already felt withdrawn out of the oddness of the conversation. She stepped away from his grasp, uneased. "I think I'm going back to the others now."

* * *

The foreman had a simple thought; it was that for every little thing, there is a reason to be cautious about it.

This steel-plated wolf had all the parts to being in control: he stood on a high dais, that rested on a hill - that allowed him a view of the project below at large. He was shielded by an entourage of men that had ridiculously armed their bodies endlong, and that instilled fear. This gave the foreman all the sway on the work-fodder, who were all too dispirited anyways to take up arms even without the presence of the wolf's army. That gave him micromanagement, or at least, at its most effectual.

But he knew his power was not ubiquitous - the larger the scheme, the more chance trouble befalls him, the more he can't control. The mongrel's gaze fell on the suspicious forest regions, then to his workers under.

At last, he gathered his assistants' attention. "The ship will sail tomorrow."

A sudden fuzz between the men.

"But sir!" Some golden-robed goat broke through his surrounding sentry. "The master asked that we deliver on time!"

"Tell that man that the circumstances had unfortunately reduced his choices to only these two," he counted with his fingers, "One, either his shipment will be a day late, or two, his boat won't make berth at all."

The goat fretted, all too adamant to oppose. "Why postpone it sir? We have not projected any bad weather we-"

"Am I not mistaken," he dismissed, "one of the Liang Lian agents is visiting here awhile?"

"Yes, sir. But-"

"He himself should be enough..." The wolf drew out a hasty breath, reconsidering his approach. Shall he truly officialize it? Shortly after, he was decisive. "Tell that man, once he arrives at the city gates, that he'll be resting on the ship instead. Yes men, make it known that Dequan City is no longer his final destination."

"But sir, that would be inconvenient news for the man, it isn't exactly his direct duty to protect the ship."

"Yes, but if he decides not to worry about this, he himself is left compromised. We all know the vulnerability of the Liang Lian no matter how powerful they are. Perhaps selfishness could incentivize him." The wolf was unwavered. "See to it that he gets my command."

"You'll be frustrating people you can't afford to frustrate, sir." the goat warned the last time.

"And I couldn't care less. I suppose this is why the masters have taken the unusual decision to make me ruler over you, fellow goat." The wolf's daunting grin showed his backmost molars, pointed and murderous.

* * *

Travelling not far off the ocean bank proved to be a difficult task for the five. The jagged shoreline's many land-curbs blocked the warriors' view from what's directly straight ahead, and so they were left to search blindly for the jolt of the sudden sight of the ship.

But it turned out that their anticipation was cut short. The ship came to them in no surprise - it was too large to be a surprise. The masts of it stood from the woods much like a steeple does stand out surrounded by low-built residences - it could be seen miles away.

And it didn't take much to sense they were closer than ever.

Tigress held her nose up. The wind brought a sort of medicinal smell with it… a foul, salty tinge that's tangible enough to taste. Behind an approaching hill, flaming light was being emitted - the fiery hues suspended on the foggy air - an amber glow welcomed them in.

She halted.

This was it.

The group's tramping of feet quietened to a stealthy one, so that the distant sounds of laboring and talking were left heard: metallic, booming uproar. Tigress promptly scrambled up the inclined land, dirt kicked backwards from her digging soles as she hastily did so. The sounds only grew to become a formidable orchestration.

That grand build of noise did not disappoint once the tiger finally summited and saw the site to behold. She could hear Monkey whimper from behind as he continued to cower closer to her personal space. "I think I just peed my pants through my bumhole."

The monkey just shit his pants.

Tigress loosened the collar from her ostensibly tightening neck. If it wasn't for modesty, she would have told the simian that she too felt like having the same reaction. For a small ways down the embankment, there was a shore of many on-going machinations. Hundreds of large, armored men peppered along a sea of their own drudges: a countless bunch of scraggly, injured pigs. The admission of this unsightly fire, evil and labor overwhelmed her sense, and everything turned to a blur.

She moved apart, leaving Monkey to rattle all by himself.

The group's collective attention was towards the moored ship, which was large enough to be the panoramic backdrop for the evil-laden esplanade - the ocean wasn't even in sight. Against the moon's full blast, the vessel remained a silhouette.

Crane stooped next to Tigress. "Holy moly mother of the gods. How much is that ship holding y'think?"

The tiger rended the plants to provide a better view for herself. From there, she spotted an army of parked carts by the peripherals of the scheme. Some transports conveyed a great deal of nearly mountainous cargo.

It seemed as if Crane had also caught sight of what the tiger noticed. "Well, at least most of the carts are empty."

Apropos of her earlier observation, Tigress shook her head. "No. They aren't empty, they were emptied. Most of the contraband is already in the ship."

"Oh. Yeah that makes more sense, should've 'duh'ed me there…" The bird scratched the back of his neck. "I don't know why I didn't guess that at first."

Tigress just nodded.

"And to completely answer your question, there's enough unfriendly stock in that Junk to become a pessimist." Some new face wedged her big head between the two warriors - turned out to be Rushi, to Crane's dismay. "Lots of matters at hands - mind the plurality, because that's how much there is to handle. But let's not yap over here." Before any reaction, she hooked her arms around their necks and brought them down skidding backwards.

Crane immediately grabbed his aching bum. "I don't think you had to do that. We needed to observe and... uh, stuff."

It was unplanned for Tigress to notice the golden cat's gauzed, infected, and gnarly arms that were slung around her own shoulders. With two hesitant digits, the tiger picked it off and dropped it away from herself, completely wide-eyed by the other feline's total lack of manicure.

"I'd like to make a point that you guys are missing something much bigger here, and that point is over there." Rushi answered with an aggressive lead skywards. The two traced her stiff finger to some weird, black geometry in the sky - they were not quite clouds; further squinting, it was birds they now saw. Flocks upon flocks of them, all lining up militarily in perfected shapes.

Crane muttered. "Oh wow. Isn't this great news. Please tell me how we're going to capture those guards, tie them up, strip them naked, and wear their armor if there are like a million eyes in the freaking sky."

Rushi answered. "We're just going to have to find a way to make them all blind towards us."

A/N

I admit, i've done fooked up. 6 months of no updating and I give you guys a chapter below 3000 words? Absolute heresy. For that, I will 2000% guarantee an update next week. No more slacking! This is serious business.

Much thanks to The Dragon Chronicle and The Great Ying for beta reading my story. Couldn't have done it without them.

And of course, thank you for reading my story. And please leave a review! I love and appreciate having them!


	5. The Outer Mess in the Middle Kingdom

The eight warriors lazed on a spot, unsure of what to do.

Until a pig, who Monkey first speculated was just wandering into the forest, now seemed to approach purposely towards their direction. The simian's fingers went immediately to the dagger hidden in his belt.

They were noticed.

Ju Lung saw the rouse of his companions at the sight of the intruder. "Don't be looking all worried now, kids. That pork is walking information."

The hilt of the simian's weapon was pushed back to its covers.

"Wait, wait, wait." Crane spoke. "If there's already someone who's in the operation, why do we have to sneak in?"

Ju Lung answered, but with a steady eye on the piggy prize. "He's only a half-step less clueless than me son. I've got a whole network of servants bitching for me and most of the time, they regurgitate useless shit that makes me cry. These guys know how to be private, for example: Mr. Helping Pig over there can't even board the ship nor open up no box, unless of course he enjoys the whipping sessions and wants his back to disappear entirely."

Finally, the pig entered the underbrush to their spot, and in quick seconds, belted out a few whispered sentences to Ju Lung's ear before leaving posthaste. The bear dwelled awhile; something dispiriting was said.

And so the warriors gathered around Ju Lung in anticipation - what new particulars he had from the recent tip. The longer he lagged, the more they gravitated to him.

"Dammit!" Ju Lung finally yelled, making them jump.

"What! What?" Monkey grabbed a fistful of the bear's arm-fur. "Why the reaction?"

"Get the hell off me." Ju Lung threw the simian away. "Them ship is delayed. It ain't going out today, it's going out tomorrow. You know what that means? Hmm? Do you? That means daylight on all your stupid fucking faces."

"Pretty sure that's already common sense Ju Lung." Tung said.

The bear ignored him. "It ain't hard to notice you kids. You're either extremely fucking ugly or way too beauteous to be involved in no degenerate gang. No helmet's gonna obscure your monstrosities."

"That's fine. Look at me, I'm still sneaking material in broad daylight." Mantis accentuated his size.

"Yes Mantis! That's the way to go." Viper had an assured look. "Regardless of the situation, we can do it."

Ju Lung rolled his eyes. "-Least lose them flowers on your head first princess. And, and even if you did bald yourself up, what then? It's impo-"

"It doesn't matter. We are going in that operation, we are going to board that ship and we are going to find out exactly where they're going." Viper said. "We can plan from there, but first we have to take steps. We can't lose this."

A wave of agreeance from the amateur warriors.

"I agree with the person who sounds correct." Monkey pointed to the snake. "She sounds correct."

Was there any point of arguing? Ju Lung rubbed what felt like his exploding head. _Goddamn kids._

There was, in fact, no point of arguing.

But in suddenness, a new idea came following his ceding. He stood begrudgingly. "Fine then. I have new plan in my brain anyways. Come, my dumbfucks. Chase my tail."

The opportunity was unlocked! Body suffused by giddy victory, Viper looked over to the others hoping to exchange triumphant grins on what would truly be the start of their first mission - but they all walked past her, unreceived of her attention.

They followed Ju Lung to a slight glade, where the bear finally leaned on a massive tree. "Behold, this. Our portal to get to the evil side, the piss station! We're going to be fishing for them people right on this very spot, fellow kids. It's going to be long before their ship sails, yeh? Some of them are bound to bring their bladders here. You know how those ooga-booga predatorial idiots love to over-scent each other over one spot. So them come to us, and we become them. We come out the woods, and no one's gonna notice."

"Okay guys and girls. Hide along." Rushi ushered the bewildered teens back to cover. "Let's go window shopping for the latest iron fashion."

* * *

The sound of early morning urinal relieving was awkward between two silent people. Chao Lin submittedly spoke. "You heard what the foreman said Guang?"

The wolf turned his head to the tiger. "Yeah I did. Shit news."

"Shit on crap news. I'm planning to start a fight with that Liang guy."

Guang chuckled, back to facing the tree disparagingly. "You think you could pummel his ass?"

"Hell no. Not even with a million chances and upgrade on these bad boys." he flexed his biceps. "But you and I know, if one of us could get like a single flick on that elitist shit's golden ass, it's gonna be satisfaction."

"You've got stupid juice in your brain. What's really gonna happen is you ain't gonna land a fur on him and your mama's never going to see you anymore."

The tiger chuffed. "Ma's not gonna miss anything on my death. She'll give no flying shit when she's all too comfied up in that nursing home."

"A wench house is not a nursing home."

"You know how many good, rich doctors go to that place? She can have a stroke any time she wants there, any damn time - she'll get medical service for free. It's a _damn_ good nursing home."

Guang shook his head. "Still can't believe you got her out of Bishou Chi man - that fucking city."

"Well yeah, I'm kind of a hot genius." Chao smirked.

"You're gonna have to tell me how you did that, yeah?"

"Aw man. I will for sure. But let me tell you,"

Sudden silence.

After a moment of waiting, the wolf finally checked in. "Hey Chao?" He turned. "You gonna finish or…"

But there was no Chao, there was only an empty clearing.

A rustle in the bushes behind him; "Who's there?" Guang twirled the direction, coming face first with solid darkness. The man scorpioned to the ground, a hoof mark embedded on his forehead.

Monkey jumped to the vicinity, and was instantly blinded. "Oh man Tung! You could've at least waited for him to pull his pants up before you caved his head in."

* * *

The five busied themselves, stripping the gathered men off their armor.

Viper slithered to the dazed tiger's next limb. Yanking off a padding, she spoke with a muffled mouth. "How can anyone treat their mother that way?"

"This Chao guy? Oh c'mon, be more charitable of his sacrifice." Rushi said. "Propelling his mother up a city instead of himself's a good deed. Would you be willing to do that with your mother?"

Viper raised a brow. _What?_

"Guys, I think we should talk later." Tigress swiftly wore the thieved chestplate, it's weathered backing filing through her itched skin. The armor glared from the sunlight, and all of sudden the tiger felt pressed by a million hot pokers. The warriors were soon donned in this disguise, stratified by all forms of paddings and metal sheets that comprised it.

"My god I'm wearing a damn sauna! Am gonna sweat me my own swimming pool just to chill in it." Tung growled.

Monkey opened a bag for Viper and Mantis to slip in. "Can I dive in too?"

Mantis popped out the satchel. "That's disgusting bro."

"Whatever, 'bro'." The simian drew the drawstrings outwards, essentially choking the bug with the tightened hem.

Rushi was barely standing with all the weight rested on her. "One could say we are wearing three kinds of armor all at once."

"The men behind this entire operation are paranoid people." Ju Lung spoke, moving freely in his gear-less body. "If they could, they'd put their bitch-men in whole blocks of cement for 'added protection'."

"Quite charming actually." Rushi added.

Crane poked his head into the gathering. "Hate to intrude, but what am I going to do? Is there any particular, bird gear I should wear? Preferably the ones with more ventilation actually-"

"There ain't no specie in that ship softer than crocodiles and hawks, son. Except for the pigs…" Ju Lung propped his massive self on the bird. "So you and I Cluckers, we're staying behind on a side mission of our own."

Tigress blew. "What, no!"

"And why not?" The bear challenged.

"I'm responsible for their lives. Including Crane's."

"Shit, really?" The bear ridiculed. "And putting him in that ship's responsible?"

Tung looked ethereally into space, "They're gonna pick him off faster than a little girl beheads a single rose in a flowerless garden."

Baffled, but Ju Lung stressed nodding along with bull anyways. "His point, my point, against yours. You really think you've got something to keep this bird safe?"

"Yes, I do." The tiger widened her frame, but within her she was everything but strong and resolute. "_me_."

It came off more as a question.

Ju Lung burst in hollow laughter, "That's cute. Now c'mon with me Cluckers."

"Please never call Cluckers. My name is Crane." The bird bent around for a farewell; he shot an assured look to Tigress, before being concealed by the forest contexture following Ju Lung.

"Hey, Isn't Ju Lung supposed to come with us though?" Monkey asked.

Tung moved to the scarce of the treeline. "Late change of plans. They're going to be spying on a few people while we do the nasty work."

"Why didn't we know about this." Tigress moved to his side.

Tung gestured for silence. The foot traffic closest to their part of the upper reaches had a sort of timely pattern in their ebb and flow. He awaited the impending. "There it is, a crowd."

Tigress lifted the visor on her helmet, searching. _Crowd?_

The others left her side.

There were long seconds of latency in the tiger, by the time she noticed she was alone, Tung and Rushi already diverged with the passing group of soldiers.

Shifu would've scolded her incompetence.

She groaned, pursuing them quickly; it never recurred to her the thrill of high-stakes, given her little experience with it - but as sprinted down the embankment and joined the throng of her stenchy foes, she could only imagine this one was going to be more than she what she was built up for. In her tippy toes, she kept her head afloat amongst the drowningly large men; they were in motion to the ship, but in an arrestingly slow pace.

* * *

The entrance was into the ship's hold, and it was not the best first place to be acquainted with in the enemy setting. Tigress marveled at the sight. The way the cargo was arrayed was much like a warehouse of its own, except this one had its shelves extended way into the darkness - it seemed as if the bulwark was a mile away.

"C'mon you lazy bastards." A croc sent out an arching whip and Tigress barely dodged its course. "Rig the ship before the tide leaves us! Get on the damn deck. Get on!"

Tung bodied the overwhelmed tiger to the side of darkness until they were isolated from the streamline of workers. "You better tell your fun-sized ape to keep it still next time." he hissed, tossing his bag by her feet.

The simian crawled out of it and ran off.

There was muffled trotting above as the rest of the men dispersed into the upper part of the ship.

Rushi set down her sack for Viper and Mantis to crawl out as well. "Give him a break. Poor guy probably couldn't breathe."

"I'll knock him out next time so he wouldn't have that problem, yes?"

Tigress unlidded a box. Some granular, grey material shot upwards. "Gunpowder." She opened another case, this one sent loud clanging noises, avouched glass contents. Revealing the entire aperture, she was right. It was a box filled with bottles.

"Oh so we're acting rash now." Tung fanned away the released dust motes. "Might as well start a fight at this rate."

"I think you should hold on to that idea." Tigress pulled a bottle from the arrangement and left the scene. The others followed.

"Oh my." Viper was quick to clean the evidence of tampering, closing the crates and dispersing the smoke.

"Okay I'm kind of confused now. Are you holding a water bottle or what?" Mantis hopped to try to mount on Tigress's shoulders, but she was too swift.

The tiger suddenly stopped, "No. It's far from that." She held the flask to the strays of light sourced by some of the ship's decaying perforations. Shown to be a sickly green liquid, it also proved to be abnormally reactive with its torrential currents swirling within, just from Tigress's slight motion. It took a while to settle.

Mantis took a closer look, the liquid expanding his face into a fish-eye. "Is it poison?"

"We don't know." Tigress said.

Monkey swiped it off and took a sip.

Viper gasped.

The simian smacked his lips tastefully. "Nope." he hands it back to Tigress. "Not poison. I know it. It's in the taste. It's a sort of sleep-inducing agent, I believe from a valerian plant mixed with other solutions, if I had a little more, I'd probably be sleeping on this spot."

"What the hell." Tung murmured.

Tigress hesitantly took the bottle. "And how do you know this?"

"When I was still as broke as a hobo, I had several gigs. One of them was drinking samples from this alchemist. Hoo hoo! Those were the good days."

Mantis leaned in to Viper. "No wonder he's kind of coo coo."

"The question here is why?" Rushi unveiled another box, and in it were the same bottled contents. "There are probably millions of these in here."

Tigress looked around the hold's massive accumulation - rows upon rows of lethal instruments, but for what grand purpose? She was yet to know. But though she was ignorant of this subject, something else gave her a new understanding, one that should manifest now; the tiger set the bottle down decisively. "We can't let this ship get into their hands - whoever they are."

"So we're going to fight." Tung said.

"If we don't, it would be like giving our murderer a darn big knife. We're just allowing to be killed at that point." Rushi took the bottle for herself. "Plus we know the purpose of this. And if we somehow used it against them…"

The golden feline was suggestive, and Tigress nodded to it.

"It's war then." The bull unsheathed his sword. Monkey just puffed out his chest and Viper finally took off the flowers on her head.

"Wow wow wow guys. Are you crazy?" Mantis made giant swinging gestures in effort to gather their attention. "Like can you guys not see the future of this at all?"

"Yes I can." Tung released the entire length of his sword. "At least I can see two futures here right now. If this ship get to 'em, we've only got one, and that be defeat."

Mantis held his arms out inoffensively. "Okay okay. I agree with that completely, but hear me out. There is a specific time which we can strike, and I don't know _that_ time, but I do know it isn't this one. There are just too many problems here-"

"List them." Rushi defied.

"Come on. Seriously. Four of us are morally obligated not to kill people out of the unspoken contract that as honorable warriors of Kung Fu, we must always be merciful yata yata, I don't know about you two."

Tung spoke. "We don't just straight up kill people man."

"In conclusion, we're all just a bunch of losers who can't finish the deed." Mantis shrugged. "Say we win. We're left with a ship filled with hundreds of knocked out men, bound to wake up in an hour or so. Rushi, can we trust the city jail?"

"No we cann-"

"No we cannot! Where's the nearest good-hearted prison, you may ask. A few hundred miles away, probably. How can all of us six losers get all the hundred other losers to that prison before they wake up from their naptime? It's impossible." He gasped for air. "With slim chances, you guys may be able to destroy the ship, sure. But what if there's an opportunity where you could do that, and get all these people arrested."

Tigress, meaningfully quiet throughout, finally spoke. "There is something." She dug through her padded armor, fishing out a map. "The Jade Palace gets royalties on a lot of prisons - they're financially tied to our treasury and in all logical sense they should be loyal to us. Some of them happen to be by ports… Do you mind?" She handed the map to Tung. "Please, the directions."

"Well I only know a general direction of our heading." His hoof went sea-wards to the South China gulfs and then headed east.

"Stop." Tigress swatted his hand off. "Look, it's perfect. Anxi Zhi è Prison here by a chokehold we're going to pass through."

"That's a days journey." It was Viper's time to play with the potion. "Lots of meals those crewmen are going to go through."

* * *

The ship left the bay.

_The ship left the freaking bay. _

Crane couldn't convince himself that everything would be fine. Observing behind his coign of vantage, the bird watched as a flight of the buzzards took off and migrated asea, accompanying the distant Junk. He worried for himself, and now he had to worry about the uncertain prospect of his companions. The sheer amount of flyers casted a cloud-like shadow, and the darkening skies made Crane instinctively coil his neck closer to his chest.

When the last of the bird trailed away, the clarity of the sunlight hit the ground once more - his eyes fell to his markedly tilted shadow. _I should be sweeping the mess hall right now._

But here he sat, overlooking the now emptied harbor. The absurdity of his situation made his acceptance of it only half-baked. "Get it together Crane." he whispered. The faraway ship already reached the horizon. "Get it together."

a/n

hahaha. Finally updated on time!

Thanks again for the Great Ying and Dragon Chronicle for beta reading my story, and thanks for all the reviewers taking the time to comment on my story! I really really appreciate it guys.


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